My life has changed a lot in the last year. I've gone through some really low points, but I've come out the better for it. The biggest change is that I've finally come to terms with my beliefs, that I am an atheist and always have been, but for the people I surrounded myself with. Ironically, I feel like a huge burden has been lifted from my shoulders, like I'm no longer walking through the world carrying someone else's beliefs on my back. I don't think I hate myself anymore. I can wake up in the morning and not immediately condemn the day as lost, as my previous beliefs would tell me, "what's the point?" And what's more, I don't blame god anymore. It's hard to blame someone you don't believe in. I'm finally ready to move on with my life with no regrets.
As for life in general, I will be graduating from college in exactly one week. Insane. Hard to believe how fast it went. Future plans are tentative, at best. For this summer I will be living with my mom, and am making plans to go to Warped Tour in July to see Bad Religion, Flogging Molly, Less Than Jake, and Streetlight Manifesto (four of my favorite bands), my work will be in an art show in the month of June in Owego (opening is on June 19th at the artspace gallery on front street there, be there!), possibly making a trip out to NYC with Britt to see the sights(and to visit Theo and Jonah), and visiting various people from Ithaca, Syracuse, and Binghamton, also making plans for a roadtrip out to Maine with Eric then hitting up Boston to visit Bruno and the Sam Adams brewery. I'll probably be working at the Vestal Wal-Mart for the summer as well. In August I'm moving back out to Keuka, not for school, but to live with Matt and his friend Steph as they do their Occupational Therapy grad work until May of next year (only $750 for the entire year, utilities included, hell yes). The place is right on the lake and about a mile from the college and fully furnished, it's pretty awesome. The year after that I plan to move out to Maine with Eric (unless his thing with the University of Rochester comes through, in which case we'll be back out here). After that, I don't really know. I'm thinking of heading for the west coast. In the meantime I'll be working on getting a job with a major video game magazine, as well as writing my novel, so we'll see how that pans out.
Anyway, lots of crazy stuff going in my life. Who knows how it'll all turn out? I have a lot of plans for the future, including travel plans to see the world and becoming famous for my writing. Here's hoping for the best. Also, keep this optimistic side of me under your hat. I have an image to maintain, dammit.